Brain Aneurysm Stories
Emily's Mom
Hello, my name is Emily Carter. I am a recent member of your forum and viewer of your page. I wanted to share the following speech as my story. It is the speech that I gave at my mother's memorial service after she passed from a ruptured brain aneurysm. The memorial was held at my parent's home, in Somerset, KY. She died two weeks before my brother's wedding and 8 days before her 57th birthday. She was an amazing individual and I miss her everyday. I have added some additional information in brackets [ ] to provide a clearer picture. I have also attached two photos. Thank you for listening and giving me the opportunity to speak.
Thank you all for joining us here today to remember and celebrate the life of an individual who was larger than life: Sara Ann McLinskey Carr.
Fifty-three days ago I received a call from my father; undoubtedly the worst call of my life. I had an eleven hour drive from Philadelphia to get home [to Somerset, KY]- which allowed me quite a bit of time for reflection (wanted or not). It took many, many, many hours to find the positive in our horrendous situation. We were nearly through Maryland when it dawned on me; I, we, got an extra ten years.
Many of you may recall when, in 1999, Mom had a brain aneurysm. The aneurysm was a chance find by a doctor who wasn’t looking for it. [She was having hearing problems and the audiologist took a scan - the technician reviewing the scan happened to see it. She was fortunate enough to go to Buffalo, NY and have the aneurysm sealed with a coil] She was able to have it sealed and live a completely normal life. On August 19th, the same aneurysm ruptured. We, essentially, received the gift of an extra decade with a bright soul. Instead of passing when Simon and I were in high school, she was able to see us grow, find spouses, begin our families and mature into our adult lives. Dad had more time to cherish Mom’s vivacious ways, to travel with her and to share all that life had to offer our family.
Is our situation ideal? Obviously not. But, we have to find the good and carry on. Mom lived the way she wanted (with her exuberant joy of life), died they way she wanted (fast and without illness or pain) and, today, we are celebrating the way she wanted (with a big-ass party).
So, about my Mom…
My mother imprinted an outgoing nature into my essence. As a natural introvert, I learned to talk to and love people through her. She never met a stranger. As a child, this embarrassed me to no end; but, as an adult, I see the beauty in it. Mom showed me differences should be celebrated. That genuine attributes and actions - generosity, caring, happiness - permeate indifference. Above all, a carefree spirit will set you free.
My tribute to my mother (my friend, my confidant, my reflection) is to live a more courageous life. To give unconditionally from my heart. To be less anal with my children - to always give them infinite and non-judgmental love. To not care what others think and to speak my mind with assurance. To live with more compassion - with less emphasis on the material and my vanity. To smile all of the time and to laugh from the essence of my soul. To dance passionately and freely - especially when I know others are watching.
I will always miss my mother. But, all of us here today, are her living legacies and tributes. To truly honor her we must live our lives to the fullest; just as she did. We must never forget the way she made us feel - and should strive to give that gift to others.
Since we won’t have a formal toast this evening at dinner - I have brought my own. As many of you are aware, Mom’s drink of choice was good ‘ol Kentucky bourbon. I will leave the bottle if anyone else is interested in following suit.
May the wind always be at your back, the sun upon your face. And may the winds of destiny carry you aloft to dance with the stars.
I love you Mamma, always have, always will!
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Nothing on this website should, in any way be considered medical advice. It is presented as general information only and is not intended to diagnose or treat any type of medical condition. I am not a doctor, nurse, or any other type of medical or health care professional. Nor am I an expert on Aneurysms. However, I am an expert on the experience of having suffered a ruptured Aneurysm and the subsequent treatment I received. This site should not be considered to be, nor is it intended to be, a definitive source of information regarding Aneurysms. I have made every attempt to ensure the accuracy of any information presented here, but again, I am not a medical professional and my own interpretation of this information could be in error.